Thoughts

I feel like I am in such a panic to get everything ready for Dylon's surgery, we still have 3 months to make plans. I did some googleing today and found some places to stay around TCMC but just couldn't make myself make reservations. I will eventually make myself do it, just not today. It seems like everytime I try to get things in order, my mind starts drifting and thinking of us actually being there, and just the thought of my little man having to go through such a painful surgery just eats at me all day. In a way I wish that we would've caught this sooner, why didn't I notice the coughing earlier, I almost feel like I failed him. Even the surgeon said had his heart condition been found at birth this surgery would not be as complicated. Even though I know I should just be thankful that his irregular heart beat was even heard, and that his heart is mendable, but sometimes my mind gets to thinking negative.
However I do believe that God has a huge plan for Dylon's life and that oneday we can look back on this and be able to testify about how powerful our God's love is.